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Гарри Поттер и философский камень/ Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone

DUMBLEDORE

I should've known you would have been here Professor McGonagall. MCGONAGALL

Good evening Professor Dumbledore. Are the rumors true Albus? DUMBLEDORE

I'm afraid so Professor. The good and the bad. MCGONAGALL

And the boy?

DUMBLEDORE

Hagrid is bringing him.

MCGONAGALL

Do you think it wise to trust Hagrid w/ something as important as this? DUMBLEDORE

Ah, Prof. I would trust Hagrid w/ my life HAGRID

Professor. Dumbledore, sir. Professor McGonagall. DUMBLEDORE

No problems I trust Hagrid?

HAGRID

No, sir. Little tyke fell asleep as we were flying over Bristol. Try not to wake him. There you go. MC

Albus, do really think it's safe leaving him with these people? I've watched them all day. There're the worst sort of Muggles imaginable. They really are- - DUMBLEDORE

The only family he has.

MCGONAGALL

This boy will be famous. There won't be a child in our world who doesn't know his name. DUMBLEDORE

Exactly. He's far better off growing up away from all of that. Until he is ready. There, there Hagrid. It's not really goodbye after all. Good Luck, Harry Potter.

- - - -

AUNT PETUNIA

Up. Get up! Now!

DUDLEY

Wake up cousin! We're going to the zoo! AUNT PETUNIA

Here he comes the birthday boy!

UNCLE VERNON

happy birthday son.

AUNT PETUNIA

Why don't you just cook the breakfast and try not to burn anything. HARRY

Yes Aunt Petunia.

AUNT PETUNIA

I want everything to be perfect for my Dudley's special day! UNCLE VERNON

Hurry up! Bring my coffee boy!

HARRY

yes Uncle Vernon.

AUNT PETUNIA

Aren't they wonderful darling?

DUDLEY

How many are there?

VOLDEMORT

36, Counted them myself.

DUDLEY

36?! BUT LAST YEAR LAST YEAR I HAD 37!!! VOLDEMORT

Yes, but some of them are a bit bigger than last year's! DUDLEY

I don't care how big they are!

AUNT PETUNIA

Now, now, now, this is what we're going to do. Is that when we go out we're going to buy you 2 new presents. How's that pumpkin?

AUNT PETUNIA

It should be a lovely day at the zoo. I'm really looking forward to it. VOLDEMORT

I'm warning you now boy. Any funny business, any at all and you won't have any meals for a week. Get in.

DUDLEY

Make it move.

VOLDEMORT

Move.

DUDLEY

MOVE!

HARRY

He's asleep.

DUDLEY

He's boring.

HARRY

Sorry about him he doesn't understand what it's like, lying there day after day watching people press their ugly faces in on you. Can you hear me? It's just I've never talked to a snake before. Do you... Do you talk to people often? You're from Burma, aren't you? Was it nice there? Did you miss your family? I see. That's me as well. I never knew my parents either. DUDLEY

Mummy, Dad, come here you won't believe what this snake is doing! Woah! Woah! Ah! SNAKE

Thanks.

HARRY

Any time.

OTH

Snake! Ahh!

DUDLEY

Mum! Mummy! Help me!

PERCY

My darling boy! How did you get in there! Who did this? How did you get in there? Is there a snake?

- - - -

PERCY

It's all right sweetheart. We'll get you out of these terrible clothes. VOLDEMORT

What happened?

HARRY

I swear, I don't know! One minute the glass was there then it was gone, it was like magic! VOLDEMORT

There's no such thing as magic.

VOLDEMORT

Oh Marge is ill. Ate a funny whelk. DUDLEY

Dad! Look! Harry's got a letter!

HARRY

Hey give it back! It's mine!

VOLDEMORT

Yours? Who'd be writing to you?

VOLDEMORT

No more mail through this letterbox.

AUNT PETUNIA

Have a lovely day at the office, dear. VOLDEMORT

Shoo! Go on!

VOLDEMORT

Fine day Sunday. In my opinion best day of the week. And why is that Dudley? HARRY

Because there's no post on Sundays. VOLDEMORT

Right you are Harry. No post on Sunday. Ha! No blasted letters today! No, sir! Not one single bloody letter! Not one! No sir, not one blasted, miserable- - DUDLEY

Make it stop, please!

VOLDEMORT

Stop it!

DUDLEY

Mummy what's happening?

VOLDEMORT

Give me that! Give me that letter! HARRY

Get off! They're my letters! Let go of me! VOLDEMORT

That's it! We're going away, far away! Where they can't find us! DUDLEY

Daddy's gone mad hasn't he?

- - - -

HARRY

Make a wish, Harry.

VOLDEMORT

Who's there?

HAGRID

Sorry 'bout that.

VOLDEMORT

I demand that you leave at once. You are breaking and entering. HAGRID

Dry up Dursley you great prune. Well, I haven't seen you since you was a baby Harry. But you're a bit more along then I would have expected; particularly around the middle. DUDLEY

I'm not... I'm not Harry.

HARRY

I am.

HAGRID

Well of course you are! Got something for you. Afraid I might have sat on it at some point but I imagine it'll taste fine just the same. Baked it myself, words and all. HARRY

Thank you!

HAGRID

It's not everyday your young man turns 11 now it is? HARRY

Excuse me, but who are you?

HAGRID

Rubeus Hagrid, Keeper of Keys and Grounds at Hogwarts. Of course you know all about Hogwarts HARRY

Sorry, no.

HAGRID

No? Blimey Harry didn't you ever wonder didn't you ever wonder how your mum and dad learned it all? HARRY

Learned what?

HAGRID

You're a wizard Harry.

HARRY

I'm a what?

HAGRID

A wizard. And a thumpin' good one I'd wager once you've trained up a bit. HARRY

No, you've made a mistake. I mean I can't be a wizard... I mean I'm Harry, Just Harry. HAGRID

Well, "Just Harry" did you ever make anything happen? Anything you couldn't explain, when you were angry or scared? Um Hum. HARRY

Dear Mr. Potter, we are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. VOLDEMORT

He will not be going! We swore when we took him in that we would put a stop to all of this rubbish! HARRY

You knew? We knew all along and you never told me? AUNT PETUNIA

Of course we knew. How could you not be? My perfect being who she was. Oh I remember the day she got her letter. My parents were so proud. We have a witch in the family. Isn't it wonderful? I was the only one who saw her for what she was... a freak. And then she met that Potter, and then she had you and I knew you would be the same just as strange just as abnormal. And then, if you please, she got herself blown up, and we got landed with you. HARRY

Blown up?! You told me my parents died in a car философской crash! HAGRID

A car crash? A car crash killed Lily and James Potter? PAT

We had to say something!

HAGRID

It's an outrage. It's a scandal.

VOLDEMORT

He will not be going.

HAGRID

Oh and I suppose a great Muggle like yourself is gonna stop him. HARRY

Muggle?

HAGRID

Non- magic folk. This boy's had his name down since he were born. He's going to the finest school of witchcraft and wizardry in the world. And he'll be under the finest headmaster that Hogwarts has ever seen, Albus Dumbledore... VOLDEMORT

I will not pay to have some crack pot old fool teach him magic tricks! HAGRID

Never insult Albus Dumbledore in front of me... I'd appreciate it if you didn't tell anyone at Hogwarts about that. Strictly speaking I'm not supposed to do magic. HARRY

OK

HAGRID

We're a bit behind schedule. Best be off. Unless you'd rather stay, of course.

- - - -

HARRY

All students must be equipped with a one standard size two pewter cauldron, and may bring, if they desire, either an owl, a cat, or a toad. Can we find all this in London? HAGRID

If you know where to go.

TOM (BARTENDER)

Ah, Hagrid the usual I presume.

HAGRID

No thanks Tom, I'm on official Hogwarts business. Just helping young Harry buy his school business. TOM

Bless my soul, it's Harry Potter.

OTHER

Welcome back Mr. Potter welcome back. DORIS

Doris Crockford, Mr. Potter. I can't believe I'm meeting you at last. QUIRRELL

Harry P-p-potter. C-can't tell you how p-pleased I am to meet you. HAGRID

hello, professor I didn't see you there. Harry Professor Quirrell will be your defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. HARRY

Oh, nice to meet you,

QUIRRELL

A fearfully fascinating subject. N-not that you need it, eh, P-potter? HAGRID

Yes, well must be going now. Lots to buy. HARRY

Good bye.

HAGRID

See, Harry? You're famous.

HARRY

But why am I famous Hagrid? All those people back there how is it they know who I am? HAGRID

I'm not exactly sure I'm the right person to tell you that, Harry. Welcome Harry, to Diagon Alley. That's where you get your quills and ink. Over there, all your bits and bobs for doing wizardry. OTH

It's a world class racing broom.

OTH

Wow! Look at it the new Nimbus 2000! It's the fastest model yet! HARRY

But Hagrid how am I to pay for all this? I haven't any money. HAGRID

Well there's your money Harry! Gringotts, the wizard bank! Ain't no safer place, not one! 'Cept perhaps Hogwarts. HARRY

Hagrid what exactly are these things? HAGRID

They're goblins Harry. Clever as they come the goblins, but not the most friendly of beasts. Best stay close. Mr. Harry Potter wishes to make a withdrawal GOBLIN

And does Mr. Harry Potter have his key? HAGRID

Wait a minute. Got it here somewhere. Ha! There's the little devil. Oh, and there's something else as well. Professor Dumbledore gave me this. It's about You- Know- What in vault you know which. GOBLIN

Very well.

GRIPHOOK

Vault 687. Lamp please. Key, please HAGRID

Didn't think your mum and dad would leave you with nothing now did you? GRIPHOOK

Vault 713.

HARRY

What's in there Hagrid?

HAGRID

Can't tell you Harry. Hogwarts business. Very secret. GRIPHOOK

Stand back.

HAGRID

Best not to mention this to anyone Harry. HARRY

I still need... a wand.

HAGRID

A wand? Well, you want Ollivander's. There ain't no place better. Why don't you run along and wait. I got one more thing to do. Won't be long. HARRY

Hello? Hello?

OLLI

I wondered when I'd be seeing you Mr. Potter. It seems only yesterday that you mother and father were in here buying their first wands. Here we are. Well give it a wave. Apparently not. Perhaps this. NO, no definitely not. No matter. I wonder... Curious... very curious HARRY

Sorry but what's curious

OLLI

I remember every wand that I've sold Mr. Potter, every one. It so happens that the phoenix whose tail feather resides in your wand, gave another feather. Just one other. It is curious that you should be destined for this wand when its brother gave you that scar. HARRY

And who owned that wand?

OLLI

We do not speak his name. The wand chooses the wizard Mr. Potter. It is not always clear why. But I think it is clear that we can expect great things from you. After all, He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named did great things. Terrible, yes, but great. HAGRID

Harry! Harry! Happy Birthday!

HARRY

Woah!

HAGRID

You all right Harry? You seem very quiet. HARRY

He killed my parents didn't he? The one who gave me this. You know Hagrid. I know you do. HAGRID

First and understand this Harry because it's very important. Not all wizards are good. Some of them go bad. A few years ago one of them went as bad as you can go. His name was V--. His name was V--. HARRY

Well maybe if you wrote it down?

HAGRID

Naw I can't spell it. All right, Voldemort. HARRY

Voldemort?

HAGRID

Shh. It was dark times Harry, dark times. Voldemort started to gather some followers. Brought them over to the Dark Side. Anyone who stood up to him ended up dead. Your parents fought against him. Nobody lived once he decided to kill them. Nobody, not one. Except you. HARRY

Me? Voldemort tried to kill me?

HAGRID

Yes. That ain't no ordinary cut on your forehead Harry. A mark from that only comes from being touched by a curse, an evil curse at that. HARRY

What happened to V--... To You-Know-Who? HAGRID

Well some say he died. Codswallop in my opinion. Nope, I reckon he's out there still too tired to carry on. But one thing's absolutely certain. Something about you stumped him that night. That's why you're famous. That's why everybody knows your name. You're the boy who lived. HAGRID

Well some say he died. Codswallop in my opinion. Nope, I reckon he's out there still too tired to carry on. But one thing's absolutely certain. Something about you stumped him that night. That's why you're famous. That's why everybody knows your name. You're the boy who lived.

- - - -

HAGRID

What are you looking at? Blimey is that time? Sorry Harry, but I'm gonna have to leave you. Dumbledore would be wanting his... Well, he'd be wanting to see me. Now, your train leaves in 10 minutes. Here's your ticket. Stick to it Harry, that's very important. Stick to you ticket. HARRY

Platform 9?? But, Hagrid, there must be a mistake. This says Platform 9?. There's no such thing. Is there? OTH

Sorry.

HARRY

Excuse me! Excuse me!

OTH

On your left.

HARRY

Excuse me sir. Can you tell me where I might find Platform 9?? OTH

9?? Think you're being funny do you? MRS. WEASLEY

It's the same every year packed with Muggles of course. Come on! HARRY

Muggles?

MRS. WEASLEY

Platform 9? this way! All right Percy you first. Fred you next. GEORGE WEASLEY

He's not Fred I am!

FRED WEASLEY

Honestly, woman you call yourself our mother! MRS. WEASLEY

I'm sorry George.

FRED WEASLEY

Only joking! I am Fred.

HARRY

Excuse me! Could you tell me how to... MRS. WEASLEY

How to get on to the platform? Yes, not to worry dear, it's Ron's first time to Hogwarts as well. Now, all you have to do is walk straight at the wall between platforms 9 and 10. Best do it at a run if you're nervous. GINNY

Good luck!

- -

RON WEASLEY

Excuse me, do you mind? Every where else is full. HARRY

Not at all.

RON WEASLEY

I'm Ron by the way! Ron Weasley.

HARRY

I'm Harry. Harry Potter.

RON WEASLEY

SO it's true! DO you really have the... the... HARRY

The what?

RON WEASLEY

The scar?

HARRY

Oh!

RON WEASLEY

Wicked!

OTH

Anything off the trolley dears?

RON WEASLEY

No, thanks, I'm all set.

HARRY

We'll take the lot!

RON WEASLEY

Woah!

HARRY

Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans?

RON WEASLEY

They mean every flavor! There's chocolate, peppermint and also, spinach liver, and tripe. George sweared he got boogie flavored one once. HARRY

These aren't real frogs are they?

RON WEASLEY

It's just a spell. But it's the cards you want. Each pack's got a famous witch or wizard. I got about 500 me self. Watch it! That's rotten luck. They've only got one good jump in them to begin with. HARRY

I've got Dumbledore!

RON WEASLEY

I've got about 6 of him.

HARRY

Hey, he's gone!

RON WEASLEY

Well you can't expect him to hang around all day, can you? This is Scabbers by the way. Pathetic isn't he? HARRY

Just a little bit.

RON WEASLEY

Fred gave me a spell to turn him yellow. Want to see? HARRY

Yeah!

RON WEASLEY

Ahem... Sunshine...

HERMIONE

has anyone seen a toad? A boy named Neville's has one. RON WEASLEY

No.

HERMIONE

Oh are you doing magic? Let's see then. RON WEASLEY

Ahem. Sunshine Daisies Butter Mellow Turn this stupid fat rat yellow. HERMIONE

Are you sure that's a real spell? Well, it's not very good is it? Of course, I've only tried a few simple ones myself but they've all worked for me. For example: Oculus Reparo. That's better isn't it? Holy cricket! You're Harry Potter! I'm Hermione Granger. And you are...? RON WEASLEY

I'm Ron Weasley.

HERMIONE

Pleasure. You two better change into your robes. I expect we'll be arriving soon. You've dirt on your nose by the way. Just there. HAGRID

Right then. First years this way, please! First years, don't be shy. Come on now, hurry up! Hello Harry! HARRY

Hi Hagrid!

RON WEASLEY

Woah!

HAGRID

Right, then. This way to the boats. Come on now, follow me. RON WEASLEY

Wicked!

- - - -

MCGONAGALL

Welcome to Hogwarts. Now, in a few moments you will pass through these doors and join your classmates. But before you take your seats, you must be sorted into your houses. They are Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Slytherin. Now while you're here your house will be like your family. Your triumphs will earn you points. Any rule breaking and you will loose points. At the end of the year, the houses with the most points is awarded the house cup. NEVILLE

Trevor! Sorry.

MCGONAGALL

The Sorting Ceremony will begin momentarily. DRACO MALFOY

It's true then, what they're saying on the train. Harry Potter has come to Hogwarts. N & OTH

Harry Potter?

DRACO MALFOY

This is Crabbe and Goyle. And I'm Malfoy. Draco Malfoy. Think my name's funny do you? No need to ask yours. Red hair and a hand-me-down robe? You must be a Weasley. You'll soon find out that some wizarding families are better than others, Potter. You don't want to making friends with the wrong sort. I can help you there. HARRY

I think I can tell the wrong sort for my self thanks. MCGONAGALL

We're ready for you. Follow me.

HERMIONE

It's not real the ceiling. It's just bewitched to look like the night outside. I read about it in Hogwarts, A History. MCGONAGALL

Will you wait along here please. Now before we begin, Professor Dumbledore would like to say a few words. DUMBLEDORE

I have a few start-of-term notices I wish to announce. The first years please note, that the Dark Forest is strictly forbidden to all students. Also, our caretaker, Mr. Filch, has asked me to remind you that the third floor corridor on the right hand side is out of bounds to all who do not wish to die a most painful death. Thank you. MCGONAGALL

When I call your name you will come forth, I shall place the Sorting Hat on your head, and you will be sorted into your houses. Hermione Granger! HERMIONE

Oh, no. OK relax.

RON WEASLEY

Mental that one, I'm telling you.

SHARRY

Ah, right then. Hum... Right. Okay, Gryffindor! MCGONAGALL

Draco Malfoy!

SHARRY

Slytherin!

RON WEASLEY

There's no witch or wizard who went bad who wasn't in Slytherin. MCGONAGALL

Susan Bones!

HARRY

Ow!

RON WEASLEY

Harry what is it?

HARRY

Nothing. Nothing, I'm fine

SHARRY

...where shall I put you? Let's see... I know! Hufflepuff! MCGONAGALL

Ronald Weasley!

SHARRY

Ha! Another Weasley! I know just what to do with you... Gryffindor! MCGONAGALL

Harry potter

SHARRY

Hmmm... Difficult, very difficult. Plenty of courage, I see. Not a bad mind either. There's talent, oh yes, and a thirst to prove yourself. But where to put you... HARRY

Not Slytherin, not Slytherin!

SHARRY

Not Slytherin eh? Are you sure? You could be great you know. It's all herein your head. And Slytherin will help you on the way to greatness, there's no doubt about that. No? (Harry whispering: Please, Please anything but Slytherin, anything but Slytherin.) Well if you're sure, better be... Gryffindor! MCGONAGALL

Your attention please.

DUMBLEDORE

Let the feast begin!

HARRY

Wow!

SFRED WEASLEY

I'm half and half. Me dad's a Muggle, mam's a witch. Bit of a nasty shock for him when he found out! HARRY

Say Percy, who's that teacher talking to Professor Quirrell? PERCY

Oh, Professor Snape, head of Slytherin house. HARRY

What's he teach?

PERCY

Potions. But everyone knows it's the Dark Arts he fancies. He's been after Quirrell's job for years. RON WEASLEY

Ah!

SIR NEVILLE

Hello! How are you? Welcome to Gryffindor. OTH

It's the Bloody Baron!

PERCY

Hello, Sir Nicholas. Have a nice summer? SIR NEVILLE

Dismal. Once again my request to join the Headless Hunt has been denied. RON WEASLEY

I know you. You're Nearly Headless Nick. SIR NEVILLE

I prefer Sir Nicholas if you don't mind. HERMIONE

"Nearly" headless? How can you be "nearly" headless? SIR NEVILLE

Like this.

RON WEASLEY

Ah!

- - - -

PERCY

Gryffindors, follow me, please. Keep up. Thank-you. OTH

Ravenclaw follow me. This way.

PERCY

This is the most direct part to the dormitories. Oh, and keep an eye on the staircases, they like to change. Keep up please, and follow me. Quickly now, come on. Come on. OTH

That picture's moving!

OTH

Look at that one.

OTH

I think she fancies you.

OTH

Look, look!

OTH

Who's that girl?

WALL PICTURE

Welcome to Hogwarts!

THE FAT LADY

Password?

PERCY

Caput Draconis. Follow me, everyone. Keep up. Quickly, come on! Gather around here. Welcome to the Gryffindor common room. Boys' dormitories is upstairs and down to your left. Girls the same on your right. You'll find all your belonging have already been brought up.

- - - -

RON WEASLEY

Whew! We made it! Can you imagine the look on McGonagall's face if we were late? That was bloody brilliant! MCGONAGALL

Thank-you for that assessment Mr. Weasley. Perhaps it would be more useful if I transfigured Mr. Potter and yourself into a pocket watch. That way one of you might be on time. HARRY

We got lost.

MCGONAGALL

Then perhaps a map? I trust you don't need one to find your seats.

SEVERUS SNAPE

There will be no foolish wand-waving or silly incantations in this class. As such, I don't expect many of you to appreciate the subtle science and exact art that is potion making. However, for those select few who possess the predisposition. I can teach you how to bewitch the mind and ensnare the senses. I show you how to bottle fame, brew glory, and even put a stopper in death. Then again maybe some of you have come to Hogwarts in possession of abilities so formidable that you feel confident enough to not pay attention. Mr. Potter, our new celebrity. Tell me what would I get if I added root of asphodel to an infusion of wormwood? You don't know? Well let's try again. Where Mr. Potter would you look if I asked you to find me a bezoar? HARRY

I don't know, sir.

SEVERUS SNAPE

And what is the difference between monkswood and wolfsbane? HARRY

I don't know sir.

SEVERUS SNAPE

Pity. Clearly fame isn't everything. Is it Mr. Potter?

SFRED WEASLEY

Eye of rabbit, harp sting hum, turn this water into rum... Eye of rabbit harp sting hum, turn this water into rum. HARRY

What's Seamus trying to do to that glass of water? RON WEASLEY

Turn it to rum. Actually he managed to make weak tea yesterday, before--- Ah, mail's here. HARRY

Can I burrow this? Thanks.

OTH

Hey look! Neville's got a Remembrall. HERMIONE

I've read about those. When the smoke turns red it means you've forgotten something. NEVILLE

The only problem is I can't remember what I have forgotten. HARRY

Hey Ron, somebody broke into Gringotts. Listen: "Believed to be the work of Dark wizards or witches unknown, Gringotts goblins were acknowledging the breach insist nothing was taken. The vault in question number 713 had been emptied earlier that very same day." That's odd. That's the vault Hagrid and I went to.

- - - -

MHARRY

Good afternoon, class.

OTHS

Good afternoon Madame Hooch.

MHARRY

Good afternoon Amanda, good afternoon. Welcome to your first flying lesson. Well what are you waiting for? Everyone step up to the left side of their broomstick. Come on now, hurry up. Stick your right hand over the broom and say up. H & OTHS

Up! Up!

HARRY

Woah!

DRACO MALFOY

Up.

RON WEASLEY

Up. Up!

MHARRY

With feeling!

HERMIONE

Up. Up! Up. Up!

RON WEASLEY

UP! Ow! Shut up Harry.

MHARRY

Now once you've got hold of your broom, I want you to mount it. Grip it tight. You don't wanna be sliding off the end. When I blow my whistle, I want each of you to kick off from the ground, hard. Keep your broom steady, hover for a moment, then lean forward slightly and touch back down. On my whistle. Three, two... Mr. Longbottom. Mr. Mr. Mr. Longbottom! OTHS

Down! Down!

HARRY

Neville!

NEVILLE

Help! Help!

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